trademarked.

I get annoyed when people make the claim "I don't like labels". I happen to like using labels to categorize people. Everyone is supposedly so fucking special and multifaceted. Using a few key adjectives to describe someone is natural and helpful.

Nouns. Adjectives. Verbs. Make complete sentences.

For instance, describing Jane as a "whore" lets me know she's promiscuous and has business aspirations. Describing John as "needy" lets me know I shouldn't bother flirting because he's a stalker, where as describing Mike as "a dick head" lets me know he's potentially available for one good night of hate sex and morning after awkwardness.

Categorizing yourself is fun but not equally as judging other people. Also, it's good to know who you think you are. Please understand that who you think you are and what others think of you could be the exact opposite. It really depends what karmic energy you're putting out into the universe. If you think you're Mary fucking Sunshine but you're actually the sick spawn of Charles Manson and Britney Spears, you might want to reevaluate your priorities.

I'm a huge pile of filthy liberal cow dung. Indeed! Hippies, flowers, peace on earth, animal rights...I'm into all that tree hugging shit. I'm also one sadistic little bitch. Words like macabre, free spirited, generous, analytical, and loud are agreeable. Psychotic, obnoxious, cute, and relentless are words not as liked, but are understood as an honest perception of myself.

The phrase "I don't want to be put in a box" is just plain ridiculous. To describe is to perceive and, therefore, attempt understanding and relatability. Generalizations get the initial job done. Friend or foe. I run for the hills when I hear "fundamentalist", others might when they hear "hipster" or "vegan".

I'm judging you and being pigeon-holed by you in turn. Let's deal with it and move on to more important issues. Like fucking each other.

breaking up is hard to do.

Was editing old entires last night and one in particular really stuck out...the one where I tenderly rip nyc a new asshole.

"I think I'm over New York. It's too comfortable and predictable. If we were dating, this would be the time in the relationship I would get bored and move onto someone new. With a nicer personality. And a better haircut." -July, 2008

Have things changed in the present months? I'm uncertain of how I feel about my surroundings. It's still comfortable and predictable. Gentrification is inevitable. Dating is abominable*.

On the other hand, it is my city (born and raised) and I should have some sense of pride. New restaurants, concerts, school, and old friends keep me occupied from full blown cynicism. I'll definitely be here for another 1-3 years. I should keep my loathing to a soft hum...wouldn't want to start a war with the neighbors.

A roadtrip is in order. Once again it is time to see what else is out there.




*Dating is abominable (brief synopsis): All the good and interesting ones are taken. But hey! Most of them are cheating. Right now. Probably with unsuspecting females like myself. Do you know where your boyfriend/husband is? Fuck it all.

sexual revolution: omnivore edition

"I cut meat from my diet and now I constantly want it in between my legs." -Anonymous

"We didn't need dialogue. We had faces!"

Yes, Halloween is technically a year away. However, I've been brainstorming. I'd like for a change to actually think of an amazing and scary costume. Last minute efforts tend to fall flat of their face. Example: this year. I was really digging my 70's dodgeball costume but it probably would have worked out better if I had more friends to join the theme. Right now I'm thinking:

1. a Marionette- Nothing is scarier than a doll. Nothing!

2. Bette Davis as Baby Jane from "What Ever Happened to Baby Jane?" (pictured below) - The only thing that can come close to being as frightening as a doll is an old, sadistic, alcoholic, ex vaudville performer still wearing little girl's clothing. The ringlets! The years of caked on makeup!

...see, dolls are creepy.

3. Gloria Swanson as Norma Desmond from "Sunset Boulevard" - Clearly decrepit bags of hollywood flesh really kick my creativity into high gear. Furthermore, I've always wanted an excuse to wear a turban.

"I'd like the coffin to be white, and I want it specially lined with satin. White... or pink. Maybe red! Bright flaming red! Let's make it gay!" - Norma Desmond

the promised land

I was a bad child on Halloween. That is all I am willing to divulge.

photo by Q. Sakamaki

week in music (oct. 19-25)

Stats
# of CD's purchased: 2
# of albums on heavy rotation: 12
# of concerts attended (this week): 2
# of concerts attended (this year): 18

It's been a busy few weeks but I caught one night of the CMJ music festival at Bowery Ballroom. The lineup included: Cory Chisel & The Wandering Souls, Shugo Tokumaru, Audrye Sessions, Love as Laughter, Wild Sweet Orange, Margot and the Nuclear So-and-Sos. Audrye Sessions were my favorite of the night. I walked around a lot, chatting with a lot of the bands. Ended up spending a good amount of time with Eric, merch guy of Wild Sweet Orange. Merch life seems strangely hectic and boring at the same time.

Friday, went to the sold out Killers show (72 seconds, really?!). Thanks again to jrm from wmmf for hooking me up with insane VIP access.

NOTE: I'm not one to brag but when the hell will this happen again? Exactly.

7:00pm- doors open. I cut 1,000 people who have been waiting on line for 4+ hours. Yep, I'm that asshole.
7:05pm- pick up my ticket from the box office. also score an after party badge.
7:10pm- get to my balcony seat. front row center. sitting above an emormous amount of drunk "bros", moshing and getting out their sexual frustration.
9:30- Killers go on. The general energy is flourishing. The downsides are: they only perform the popular radio singles and all of my favorite songs are not such. They also play 3 new songs...I only like one.

Evolution is supposed to be a positive thing...better, faster, stronger, right? Sadly they're indie/new wave sound is turning into trendy cotton candy. They need a good sharpening. If they weren't such good showmen, I'd be very dissapointed.

11:00pm- extreme shmoozing. To my left, an unnaturally rail thin Kate Bosworth holding a solo cup of beer two sizes too big for her little hands. She's very attractive...her boyfriend even more so. To my right, a shy Chris Martin of Coldplay quietly talking to models trying to break up his marriage...it's not working. Walking down the empty hallway toward the after party behind a humming Brandon Flowers (I take it he really loves music). Juliette Lewis, someone I very much admire, being as sweet as pie and looking damn hot. Ed "Chuck Bass" Westwick violently brushing past me towards the nearest exit. Totally full of himself. Very short in person. HUGE CRANIUM. British accent sounds fake.

By this time, my head is spinning. Lots of egos in one room.

Looking back, I am glad I didn't take any photos. I was trying to respectfully adapt to my celebrity-filled atmosphere.

the ex list

It's the season for remenicing. An album or particular song can bring you back to a thin hair moment in time. I believe a great majority of my music collection, or taste for that matter, has come from exes (flings and friends). This is not a revelation. Most people are influenced by whom they spend time with.

9. Gil Mantera's Party Dream, Bloodsongs, 2006

Christian #1, affectionately known as "Grinner", turned me onto this 21st century new wave/electronica duo of spandex-clad brothers. When I first heard Bloodsongs two years ago, I thought the album was straight from 1986. It's fun, fresh, and familiar in a nostalgic way.

songs to download: "Buffalo Tears", "Elmo's Wish"


8. Pixies, Surfer Rosa, 1988

My old friend Charlotte was one of the first people to introduce me to alternative music in high school. We used to exchange mix tapes that included Modest Mouse, Le Tigre, The Smiths, and Built to Spill. One of my fondest memories was dancing around to "Bone Machine" of all songs.

songs to download: "Where is my mind?", "Bone Machine"


7. Elliott Smith, XO, 1998

Another Charlotte influence. I was a late Elliott Smith bloomer. I first heard "Waltz #2" in summer 2003. Tomorrow actually happens to be the 5th anniversary of his demise. He had such a beautiful sadness in his voice. This album especially makes me miss old friends.

songs to download: "Sweet Adeline", "Bled White", "Waltz #1"


6. Radiohead, Hail to the Thief, 2003

I always considered myself a big fan, that is, until I met self proclaimed "greatest fan" Jordan C. This kid lived and breathed Radiohead. I swear that's all he listened to the entire time we spent together. He also got incredibly defensive when I suggested Radiohead and Muse sometimes sounded similar (because they do). It was difficult to pick one specific album, I pretty much closed my eyes and chose randomly.

songs to download: "Wolf at the Door", "Scatterbrain", "2 + 2 = 5"

5. Supergrass, I Should Coco, 1995

This is an album I would have never stumbled onto in my own time. I was far too young in the 90's to remember Supergrass other than the popularity of "Alright" (Clueless soundtrack).

songs to download: "Mansize Rooster", "Lenny"

4. The Killers, Hot Fuss (UK version), 2005
Most of my favorite bands were introduced to me by Jared (numbers 1-4 on this list). He had the most impeccable and interesting music taste. He was always ahead of the hippest of hipsters, discovering new bands light years before popularity. I chose the UK version over the American release because of "Glamorous Indie Rock & Roll". It was just pretentious enough to make me fall head over heels.

songs to download: "Jenny Was a Friend of Mine", "On Top", "Glamorous Indie Rock & Roll"


3. Matt Pond PA, Several Arrows Later, 2005
This might be one out of the two albums on this list where every song is perfect and download worthy. It reminds me of the transition from the last days of summer to a swift autumn breeze in the city...rooftop bbqs in October.

songs to download: "So Much Trouble", "Several Arrows Later", "Emblems", "Brooklyn Stars"


2. Athlete, Tourist, 2005
(Apparently 2005 was a good year in my life for music)
Tourist is so fucking delicate. I completely associate it as the we're-broken-up-so-i'll-listening-to-this-on repeat-and-cry-but-hey-at-least-it's-not-Barry-Manilow album. It still evokes a ton of emotion. "Chances", with its slow build up to its incredible orchestral style, just rips my heart out.

songs to download: "Chances", "Wires", "Trading Air", "Yesterday Threw Everything at Me"

1. Black Rebel Motorcycle Club, Howl, 2005
It's interesting because I didn't automatically love BRMC at first listen. I really like "Weight of the World" and "Gospel Song", but I put Howl on the back burner. I still don't know the exact reason why. However it's one of my most listened to records of 2008, which is why it's claimed the number one spot. Seriously, every single songs is haunting.

songs to download: all of them but to start..."Sympathetic Noose", "Ain't No Easy Way", "The Line", "Weight of the World", "Howl"